Well, it was bound to happen.
I'm having trouble walking and standing. It's been going on and getting progressively worse since the beginning of January. I've been to see all the great body people I know and no definitive diagnosis yet, which leads me to think it's soft tissue and maybe even related to psychosomatic causes and, um, BEING ALMOST 58 YEARS OLD! Xrays await me this week, which I hope will help rule out bone stuff.
Anyway, no stress. One moment at a time. I can get a lot done visualizing, and I'm still not through learning the ancients-- literally a handful of films left of people born in 1933 and 1934. I will sit here at my desk and finish learning what I can. Maybe I'm just empathically taking on physical limitations as I learn the movements of those in their 80's and 90's? That is kind of creepy, but why not? Pain and limitation are two things that I believe visit us more often as we age; it might be better to view them as inevitable social calls, and optimistically, as temporary ones.
The hard part of course is living with the memory of that pain and limitation and continuing to move through it. Yesterday, I wanted to move through it, and went out walking, but had to sit down every two blocks from the dull ache in my left leg. That kind of pain can lead to an aversion to walking, a shrinking of a world, a closing in of sorts. It's what all aging people deal with: the reduction of ability and the simultaneous knowledge that fighting the reduction is the best way to slow down its hold.
It's winter :-)
I'm having trouble walking and standing. It's been going on and getting progressively worse since the beginning of January. I've been to see all the great body people I know and no definitive diagnosis yet, which leads me to think it's soft tissue and maybe even related to psychosomatic causes and, um, BEING ALMOST 58 YEARS OLD! Xrays await me this week, which I hope will help rule out bone stuff.
Anyway, no stress. One moment at a time. I can get a lot done visualizing, and I'm still not through learning the ancients-- literally a handful of films left of people born in 1933 and 1934. I will sit here at my desk and finish learning what I can. Maybe I'm just empathically taking on physical limitations as I learn the movements of those in their 80's and 90's? That is kind of creepy, but why not? Pain and limitation are two things that I believe visit us more often as we age; it might be better to view them as inevitable social calls, and optimistically, as temporary ones.
The hard part of course is living with the memory of that pain and limitation and continuing to move through it. Yesterday, I wanted to move through it, and went out walking, but had to sit down every two blocks from the dull ache in my left leg. That kind of pain can lead to an aversion to walking, a shrinking of a world, a closing in of sorts. It's what all aging people deal with: the reduction of ability and the simultaneous knowledge that fighting the reduction is the best way to slow down its hold.
It's winter :-)